I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
