I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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