This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
