i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
