I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
