Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
