would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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