Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
