Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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