a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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