Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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