Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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