I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
