Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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