Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
