What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
