So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
