that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
