did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
operation have a gay friend backfired
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize
