You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
