can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
