is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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