Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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