I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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