Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
