It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
