He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
