Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
