Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
