I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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