I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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