physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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