she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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