we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize