I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
