Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
