The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
