I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
