the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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