that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
