her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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