just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
