don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
He kissed a someone with a penis
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
