speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
