Sry I called you an 8
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
