do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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