The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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