Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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