I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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