id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
